Good morning, everyone ~

Apologies for getting this out later than usual. My days/nights have been mixed up for several weeks now, and the calendar in my head doesn’t always match the one on the wall. 😯

It has been a rough experience; sometimes more so than others. For weeks now, I’ve been sleeping in my recliner, unable to get into/out of bed without causing severe pain. Then, as the pain subsided, I thoroughly enjoyed sleeping in my own bed. The only problem: I slept from 7:00a.m. until 5:00 p.m.! 😯 For several days in a row! Which left me wide awake at night … sitting upright in my recliner … watching Netflix, catching up on history, documentaries, Sci-Fi, and favorite series.

If you have a Facebook account, you may want to check out the ACPA’s monthly newsletter. There are lots of helpful hints for how to manage various types of pain, especially during the holidays. As I myself get older and develop more physical challenges, I do less-n-less in every area of my life. This greatly disappoints me, even though I understand that this is a normal progression. My disappointment plays a major role in the level of pain my body suffers. That dual role can ooze outward, affecting others around me. Even the cats can sense when I am not at my perky best. Knowing this, my disappointment grows, for I don’t want to negatively affect those I love.

My sister, who is 13 years older than I, understands this all too well. As we email one another each day, we speak honestly about our disappointments. We are a safe place for one another to voice our honest feelings. We also list our blessings, which helps remind one another that it’s the blessings in our lives that bring perspective back into balance. Yes, we are genuinely disappointed; and, yes, we are blessed! The point of balance is halfway between the two extremes.

Several dear friends and I have developed a similar method of pain management. By having a safe place and being a safe place for others to express true feelings is a priceless partnership … and one of the leading blessings in anyone’s life. Most of us have been through the harsh experience of being rebuffed, disbelieved, lectured, or ignored when we’ve attempted to find that safe place in family/friends/loved ones, even in trusted clergy or medical professionals. That adds a sense of betrayal to our list of disappointments.

Don’t give up the search! There’s a “safe place” person somewhere! Remember that adage: “You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince.” Finding a person with whom you can share your personal truths may take a few frog-kisses. Knowing who you CAN trust to and who knows they CAN trust you is a priceless “magic potion” in our pain-management toolbox.

If you have that sort of safe-place person in your life, let them know what a blessing they are in your life. it could be the best Christmas gift they get in this challenging season/uncertain world. If you don’t have one, grab hold of your courage and reach out one more time in your search to find such a person. Discover just how courageous you are in the face of pain/disappointment/betrayal and celebrate the blessing of that courage.

In these uncertain times, let’s make a list of what we are certain about … and let’s start with naming those safe-place people in our lives, and those for whom we ourselves are a safe place.

Know that each of your names is on my list! 🤗😍😊🎉 Know that I cherish each of you and am measurelessly grateful for being part of such a “medicinal” tribe!

Gentle hugs/much love,

Marian